Sunday, November 27, 2005
9:01 PM Y
training HERE I COME!!
♥ just the girl.
wooo!! nvr felt as happy before!! hehehe. on friday, the doc said i could run already!! woohoo!! xD no words can express my happiness man.. PRAISE THE LORD!! xD hehe. training, HERE I COME!! WAIT FOR MEE!!! XD wahahahahahahaha!
whee.. anyway, it's been 2 days since i blogged. haha. havent been blogging regularly lately. laziness? probably. haha. actually mostly bcuz four ppl are fighting over one com. so aiya nvm.. i nice so i give way. wahaha. =X so anyway, friday i removed all the stitches le!! wheehee! thank God! xD wahaha. after that went to see my juniors and peer train. wah had the temptation to run wif them but cant. =X dun wanna let my wound touch water TOO soon. x( felt abit left out. but den had fun talking to them too! x) went to LJS after that but i couldnt stay long cuz hadta rush home to change and get ready for HOF. whee.. den went to yireng's hse for movie marathon!! wahaha.. we shi bai again lah.. the other time we watched star wars den watch one or two den we peng sang liao. i was the first loh cuz just came back frm camp the other time. haha. dis time we watch TWO movies nia den all peng sang liaox. haha. watched the pacifier and some stupid chinese comedy. damn lame de loh. cant remember the title. it's super funny correct liaox. alvin laughed super loud loh!! hahaha. so funny lah.. jia min peng sang first cuz she first day at work den super tired ah.. watched pacifier halfway den fall aslp liaox. hahahax. poor thing. woot.. next morning she late for work loh! felt so bad. den in the end she nvr go. haiyo..
went for outreach in the afternoon on saturday. haha. was quite successfuly ba. we had three contacts and met up wif some of our old contacts. hmm.. they were quite nice loh. din like totally ignore us or wat. there was a pair of siblings tho. who TOTALLY ignore us as tho we werent dere. but yireng just said thanks. they were quite rude ah.. dun want shld at least politely say mah. nvm ba. God forgives. hehe. hmm.. after that go play pool.. wahahaha.. actually, to b more specific is to WATCH ppl play pool. haha. pei ping pong loh. hehe. went home bout 9 plus close to 10. woo.. den watch meteor garden II. hehe. xD
today, was project sunday so no band so no need go early to practise. haha. so went for main service. hmm after service, went to eat lunch at the coffeeshop nearby while waiting for my sis to finish her lesson. we had a meeting for retro christmas. discuss wat song to use and the other details. haha. after that went to far east to look around for suitable costumes. in the end, after looking for awhile, all want go drink coffee liao. sian. haha. go TCC summore. ex leh! hahax. me n my sis just share an oreo milkshake. wahaha. $6.90 loh.. haha. sian man. hmm after that, me, midori, bernice, eelen and kenneth went to LJS to eat cuz the food dere was far too EX.. cant afford. hahaha. today is also the day i got to noe kenneth better loh. found out that he's a very crappy guy loh. always bully. wahaha.
den bout 7 plus, me, bernice and midori needed to go home first so we left. as we were walking to the mrt, kenneth suddenly come frm behind loh. den cuz ber and mid like got alot to talk so i kena left out. walk myself behiind them. den he suddenly appear frm nowhere and clap his hand right at my face! crap loh. i kena shock lah. haha. mid and ber were just like "ehh?ehh?" liddat loh. den we four continue walking towards the mrt. den guess wat? mokkie, josh and daniel came frm behind also loh. mokkie also tried to scare me. wah! sian loh. TWICE in a row. den kenneth was dere laughing. lame lah. all of them so evil. haha. so anyway, all SIX of us talked quite alot on the mrt. u muz b wondering why six and not seven rite? that's cuz daniel was like so left out! not like we did it on purpose but he was so quiet! poor thing loh he. den they supposed to drop at dhoby ghaut but end up all of them sent ber, me and my sis home. all except for daniel again! he really very isolated leh. =X reminds me of me. haix. will talk more about that later. so anyway, mokkie and josh sent me n my sis home while kenneth sent bernice hom. mokkie was so funny lah! acting like a monkey at our hse void deck. haha. dunno monkey or dog lah. joker lah he. he acted as if he was frm the mental hospital!! haha. crazy one loh. making funny noises and all. hahaha. so funny. so anyway, we thanked them and they made their way home. woo.. wat a day.. x)
hmm ok.. so about that isolation thing.. well, lately i've been thinking. is it just me or wat? i dunno lah. on friday, i tried to talk more u noe. like initiate conversations and stuff. but i just seemed to b IGNORED. yes. that's the way i feel. haix. like watever i say, nobody cares. haix. felt so hurt. so in the end, i just sat at one side and din talk. and when i dun, they start asking if i'm ok. why so isolated and stuff liddat. i mean, i've TRIED! haix. nobody seems to care except for God. it's best to talk to him. cuz i noe he's always dere, listening to you. haix. i really dunno wat i shld do. i know i cant keep isolating myself. i tried my best to fit in but i just cant! den it isn't me anymore! haix. i feel as tho i have changed, but it isn't right. i want the old me back. i NEED the old me back. i dun wanna change just to go wif the crowd. haix. i just wanna b the simple girl i used to b. i wanna b simple. simple me. i dun want and dun need the attention. i just wanna b simple. God, sports and studies are all that matters to me now. i needa concentrate and b more focus. need God's help. hmm.. no more trying to b someone else already.. sick of putting on a smile that is so fake.. haix..
and recently, i'm also very troubled. over pp and the guy involved. and also troubled over my own things. the isolation thingy. so many things have happened loh. and i really dunno who to turn to except God loh. i mean, it's good that i talk to God. but i also need someone. someone whom i can talk to. someone who knows me inside out. someone to lend me a listening ear when i need it. someone to lend me a shoulder to cry on when i need it. haix. i havent found that special someone yet. dun get it wrong. i'm not talking bout a boyfriend. but just a friend whom i can turn to. it's like, if i turn to my friends at sch or in track, they'll give me wordly advice which is not so gd. and if i turn to my church frens, they'll just put me down wif all the godly advice. as in, they'll just tell me wat i've been doing is wrong wrong wrong. means not pleasing to God and stuff liddat. haix. i really dunno wat to do loh. i need someone who understands me. and will always b dere. even if that someone dun give me advice, at least just hear me out. be there for me. hear wat i havta say. dun just deem me wrong or wat. haix. waiting for that someone. hmm.. dun get it wrong. no offence to all my friends out dere. all of you have done a great job! x) to those who had been dere for me and giving me advices, thanks loads! i really appreciate it. it's just that, u dunno but i keep some things within me. i dun feel comfortable telling it to ur. =X
actually i have found my special someone. i have told her my darkest secrets. but somehow, we kinda distant le. to me, i think she has changed. but i noe, she will nvr go around telling ppl things bout me. I TRUST HER. x) she's kinda busy wif her life now and we hardly talk. we can hadly even go out together cuz she's not free. so.. dere goes my special someone. waiting for another to come by soon.. if you are, pls tell me.. x)
so well, that's all i havta say. looking forward to training tmr!! woohoo!! xD cant wait to see the trackers!! hehehe. training at temasek tho. hill runs! woo! so long nvr run that liao. haha. hopefully i dun lag behind by so much.. God help me.. x)
